Deep Thoughts

Most of Tuesday with my son was difficult.

He just can’t seem to get a break in between all these teeth coming in, and he’s back and forth between my happy baby and a miserable child. He slept quite a bit that day, but it was what he did (or didn’t do) that set me to thinking. He wanted nothing to do with any of his toys. None of them! All he seemed to want was me; just sitting on the couch with me suited him just fine. He’s always been so active, so ‘on the go’…only when he’s been truly sick or simply exhausted has he ever let me just hold him. So of course, this day really got to me.

We visited with my aunt & uncle that night, and got home around 9:30. I put Monkey to bed, or tried to anyway. He wouldn’t let me leave the crib. When I finally stepped out of the room, I stood outside his door and just cried. It just broke my heart that the next day I had to go to work and he’d be stuck with a sitter.

Don’t get me wrong, I love his daycare…heck, I stayed there as a kid! And they all love him and treat him very, very well. But they are not me.

I went on to work yesterday…and spoke with a friend of mine about the decision I’ve been tossing around ever since my son was born. And I finally brought it up to JB when he came to have lunch with me yesterday. Once he realized that I wasn’t crazy enough to think that I could quit my job entirely, he was all for the idea. So basically, what I have decided to do is this: I’m going to cut my hours back, really just enough to allow me to pay a few bills.

My main priority at this time is my son, and being with him.

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